Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Hot and Muggy

So things were so hot and muggy yesterday and today that it was actually causing hardware problems. Get this, obviously on an 85 or 90 degree day we should keep the back doors and front doors to the whole warehouse and office open to allow adequate breathing of the building and enjoy the wonderful weather. NO! Damn it, I mean I was sweating like a fat mexican thinking about eating a tasty 1 lb burrito in the baja while running a marathon.

So because we like to save on air conditioning costs here, we leave the place wide open. When I say open I mean not only to heat, but to pests, like bugs, mice, and shit. So while dying of heat exhaustion with my airconditioning unit turned on high, I also get to work with flies buzzing around and sometimes even a bee or two. Goodie!

(Just for reference sake I included a picture of the air conditioning unit... and OH YEA! it's high end baby! Also not mine.. I stole it from a co-workers office. See even I save on Air Conditioning.)

No I am sure you get my point. So meanwhile trying to focus on getting things done I needed to print a report. Too bad because of the humidity our already decrepid HP Laserjet 4550n will not print because earlier it apparently ate some a sheet after the moist paper went through it an wrinkled.

Sidenote: A little history on the printer.
The HP Laserjet 4550n has been here the length of my career and probably longer. It prints several hundred pages per day... although that number is probably smaller now as it barely works. The first thing to go on it was the actual paper tray. After at which my boss asked for a price on new ones. By the way, this was 2 years ago. Then we had to load the paper in through the front tray (You know the one for legal paper). Yeah that works like a charm.. if by working I mean sucking in 3 or more sheets everytime it prints. This worked for the company for about another year before the printer started to print lines down the paper. So now imagine sending out invoices to customers from wrinkled, lined, spotted laserjet prints. Yep, and over the course of those two years I was asked for pricing on printers at least 20 times. For which the first 10 I resent my original quote and the next ten I copied a newer updated one. Each time I would get asked which one I recommended and why we couldn't just pick up a Deskjet or something for like $200. I attempted in a polite and calm way to explain that we use a "Networked" printer that requires the whole "Company" print to it, therefore a piece of dogshit deskjet that prints 1 page per hour "WON'T WORK!" Go back to your PORN and leave the technical shit to me before you hurt yourself!
He actually about 1 month ago got pricing from someone outside of our company, as if I wasn't giving him accurate information. Again, as always, I was asked which one I recommended and I replied with my appropriate answer. And THE PRINTER still sits there!

So, anyways, the printer just doesn't work. It's not productive, professional, or even functioning as designed anymore and everyone has gone back to using Deskjets that are either out of, or almost out of ink. Wow!

So that was yesterday, but today is even more special. I know what you are thinking... How can it get better?

You know I wonder the same thing on my way into work. Actually, I wake up, thinking "Oh yippie! Another fun filled day at the office! OOOoooo... I wonder what is in store for me today? Will the boss be pissed because he didn't get any, or will he have some new wacked out idea he won't follow through on?... Hmm.. I know it's only 70 degrees out now, but should I wear a bathing suit under my work clothes so I can hose down at the neighboring office at lunch?

You see NOW the office is so HOT that not even the bugs can live inside... as a matter of fact.. I'm starting to feel faint and I don't know if I can make it to the kitchen to get more water to replenish what I have sweat out... UGH!


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